Tomorrow I set off on my travels again (19th July) and I feel just like every other time I left for a long trip.
I have this sense of quiet contemplation. I go inwards and quietly reflect on the trip ahead and linger on the thought of it. This usually results in a feeling of apprehension and thinking ‘What the hell am I doing?’.
It’s a strange feeling and I feel it every time. It’s like it’s a last ditch talk to myself, telling myself I can bow out, I don’t have to go, I can’t go but what it really is, is fear talking in my head. It’s that voice we all have that consumes so many people’s lives. Naturally I have it too but on a day to day basis I manage to keep it quiet, keep it at bay and live my life fully. It’s rearing it’s head as a last attempt to stop me from following my gut and today it manages to gain more ground than usual as I think about the monumental trip that lays before me and the reality of going it alone.
It is nerve-racking and I’d be lying if I said I had no fear at all about my upcoming trip but I need to just relax and surrender to it. I have to remember my gut feeling that led me to this decision and know once I get past this evening, all will be good. Every other time before a trip, I had the same feelings but once I reached the airport, I accepted where I was and the decision I had made and went with it. It’s like once I’m at the airport I switch my mind frame and look forward to the trip but before reaching there I toy and battle with my decision.
I’ve a long trip ahead of me tomorrow, setting out from the West of Ireland around 2am local time to hit for Dublin. Then from there I go to New York, Miami and then Nicaragua to start my adventure.
You can follow my trip on my Instagram – Karen Maloney Wellbeing. I also plan to use Snapchat as well but I will update when I have it going!
Here’s to the next chapter…